It starts the same way every time. You open a browser to check the weather, and seventeen clicks later you’re accepting cookies from a Croatian fishing blog, muting a video about luxury bathtubs, and trying to close an ad that has cleverly disguised itself as the article’s scroll bar.
This isn’t the open web we were promised. This is a hall of mirrors where the mirrors are tracking pixels, the doors lead to marketing funnels, and the exit sign subscribes you to a newsletter. It’s not that the internet has become worse by accident, it’s worse on purpose.
Because you’re not the customer. You’re the product. And the product is performing quite well.
We were told that the internet would democratize information, foster connection, and make everything free. In fairness, much of it is free. Free to use. Free to abuse. Free to surveil. Like a complimentary hotel breakfast where the eggs come with a side of identity theft.
Let’s take a look at ten ways the modern internet became slower, meaner, louder, and more expensive in ways no one put on the label.
The 10 Most Wanted (for Crimes Against the User)
1. Mobile Ruined Everything
Somewhere between the second iPhone and the eighth Android update, someone decided that scrolling was the highest form of human expression. Menus vanished. Search bars became suggestion traps. Taps replaced clicks, and half of them go to the wrong place because your thumb is apparently too fat to function in the modern economy.
Mobile didn’t simplify the internet. It made it smaller, noisier, and more prone to accidental purchases.
2. The Cookie Consent Illusion
Let’s be honest: no one reads cookie policies. You click “Accept All” like a trained seal just to see the weather in Toledo. The law tried to protect us. What we got instead were legally mandated micro-surrenders, disguised as choices. It’s not consent. It’s surrender, with sprinkles.
3. Ads Outnumber Content
You know the ones: autoplay videos with sound, fake ‘next’ buttons, floating ads that chase you down the screen like a debt collector with Wi-Fi. You came for the news. You stayed for the nervous breakdown. Somewhere in the margins is the article, trying not to interrupt the monetization.
4. Dark Patterns Are Just UX With a Criminal Record
These are the unsubscribe buttons that hide under expandable menus, the confirm-shaming popups that ask, “Are you sure you want to be less informed?” and the free trials that renew until the end of civilization. They’re not bugs. They’re strategies.
5. Data Brokers Who Know You Better Than Your Therapist
These are the people who know your sleep habits, your shopping preferences, and that you once clicked on an ad for men’s socks at 2:14 a.m. in February. You don’t know their names. They know your credit limit.
6. You Don’t Have to Log In to Be Watched
Even if you don’t log in, they know. Your browser has a signature, your device leaks metadata, and your IP address is more loyal than your dog. You thought you were anonymous? The internet knows you better than your high school yearbook.
7. Free Apps That Cost You in Bulk
You downloaded a flashlight. It needed your location. And your microphone. And your contact list. Suddenly, you’re wondering why your plumber’s cousin got an ad for antipsychotics. Free apps are just surveillance tools wearing user interfaces.
8. Infinite Scroll Is the New Limbo
It never ends. And that’s the point. The bottom of the page used to be a boundary. Now it’s a business failure. You’re not supposed to find what you came for. You’re supposed to forget why you came and keep scrolling until breakfast.
9. Rage is a Business Model
Anger spreads faster than nuance. Social platforms know this. That’s why the most engaging content makes you furious. If a post doesn’t make you feel attacked, betrayed, or vindicated, it’s considered underperforming. The algorithm’s real job is crowd control, with tear gas made of clickbait.
10. Privacy Settings That Would Confuse a Constitutional Lawyer
You can opt out of tracking, but only after finding a settings menu inside a sub-menu beneath a menu disguised as a footnote. And even then, “opt out” sometimes means “opt out on this device, until the next firmware update, or the moon cycle, whichever comes first.”
The Surveillance Economy Wears a Friendly Face
This isn’t about paranoia. It’s about design.
The internet didn’t just drift into dysfunction, it was guided there, by companies that monetize your attention and treat friction as a feature. They don’t want your trust. They want your click. And they’re very good at getting it.
But the good news is this: awareness is still resistance. You can browse more carefully. You can support platforms that respect you. And you can ask harder questions about why so much of the internet feels more like a trap than a tool. Just don’t expect them to stop watching.